New Year’s resolutions are becoming a thing of the past — at least the traditional ones, anyways. We’re doing away with weight-loss goals and similar objectives that mostly end up making us feel like failures, and replacing them with things we can enjoy doing, like finding more joy in everyday life, picking up a long-lost hobby, and learning to love ourselves better.
But none of this is linear. We don’t wake up one day in love with ourselves (and if you do, can you teach us?). The ups and downs, the good times and bad times, the ebbs and flows are all part of what makes life… life. So if your resolution was to love yourself more, and you’ve hit a plateau or haven’t even made a start, here’s how.
How to Love Yourself More:
1. Keep Things Exciting
Sometimes life is beautifully monotonous; sometimes it feels downright boring. The day-to-day grind of waking up, going to work, coming home and sleeping can feel soul-draining. And staying with that endless Groundhog Day routine, with nothing in sight to keep you excited, is no way to live. Ever wonder why you feel so much more positive about your very normal days when you have a vacation or event to look forward to? Just having that light at the end of the tunnel makes those average days feel even brighter.
And it doesn’t have to be an expensive trip — maybe your version of excitement is a massage at the end of the week, a mani-pedi with your bestie or a movie night out to watch that new film you’ve been dying to see. The simplest of pleasures can have the biggest reward. Injecting your life with excitement and joy is a surefire way to show up, and therefore love, yourself better.
2. Make Time for You
Whether you have a family you’re picking up after all day, a caregiver or someone who spends tons of time listening to their friends’ problems, you deserve some you time. Carving out pockets of time in your week to spend by yourself is crucial to filling your own cup — because no one will do it for you. Taking breaks from people who depend on you can look like booking yourself a hotel room for a night, taking yourself out for a nice dinner, reading a book in peace or having a luxurious bubble bath.
It doesn’t have to be a big affair, just time that is absolutely devoted to you — not work, laundry, making meals or being an unofficial therapist to your best friend (even though we love helping our besties out). Turn off that phone, get into your me-time zone and block out the world to recharge and show yourself the love and dedication you show others.
3. Ask for Help When You Need It
Contrary to popular belief, reaching out for help isn’t weak or burdensome to others. It’s actually a huge sign of strength and a healthy acknowledgement that we can’t (and shouldn’t have to) do this life thing alone. Asking for help can be as simple as getting your partner to pick up the slack at home or as life-changing as seeking out a therapist that works well for you. It can look like having your friend stay over with you when you’re going through a tough time, or reaching out to a parent for some extra support.
We know that asking for help isn’t always easy, especially if we grew up with an I-can-do-it-myself attitude. Think of it as doing your loved one a favour — anyone who loves you will jump at the opportunity to be there for you like you’ve been there for them.
4. Have More Fun
When you think of your childhood, what kinds of things did you do for fun? Not for the Instagram feed or the notoriety, but just for you? Maybe it was singing, making collages, painting pottery or playing video games. Exploring old joys that we shed as we grew up is one of the easiest ways to bring the child in us back out and inject our lives with more fun. Don’t worry about feeling childish — that’s the point!